.Editor's Note: The observing is the message of a letter coming from Trip Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reviewing the activities of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written significantly concerning specifics of this goal during the course of the month I've been here, mostly for pair of explanations: the very first being that there has actually been actually very little time to accomplish that type of composing, and secondly because I'm uncertain exactly how comfy I am actually sharing thought and feelings I provide friends and family along with the rest of the planet.Well, certainly the world modified today. What I mention or do is extremely minor contrasted to the significance of what took place to our nation today when it was attacked through ... through whom? Terrorists is all we understand, I suspect. Challenging to know at whom to guide our temper and fear ...I had actually simply finished a variety of duties today, the absolute most lengthy being actually the physical exams of all team participants. In an exclusive chat complying with that, the flight plastic surgeon told me they were possessing an incredibly bad time on the ground. I possessed no idea ...He illustrated the condition to me as best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually thrown for a loop, at that point horrified. My initial notion was actually that this wasn't an actual talk, that I was actually still listening closely to among my Tom Clancy tapes. It only didn't seem possible on this incrustation in our country. I could not even envision the particulars, also just before the information of further destruction began can be found in.Vladimir came by pretty quickly, picking up that one thing really major was being reviewed. I swung Michael into the module as well. They were actually also astonished as well as stunned. After our team authorized off, I tried to explain to Vladimir and also Michael as finest I might the potential size of the act of terror in downtown New york and at the Government. They plainly comprehended and also were incredibly understanding.I eyed the Planet Chart on the computer system to find where over the planet our team were actually and also discovered that our experts were happening southeast out of Canada and will be overlooking New England in a few minutes. I whized around the station up until I found a window that would certainly provide me a viewpoint of NYC and got the closest video camera. It took place to be a video camera, and I was looking south coming from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes appeared to have an odd bloom to it at the base of the column that was actually streaming south of the city. After reviewing among the news articles our company simply got, I feel we were taking a look at NY around the time of, or not long after, the crash of the 2nd tower. Exactly how unpleasant ...I swung the cam during the East Shore to the south to view if I might see any other smoke around Washington, or anywhere else, but nothing was visible.It was actually pretty complicated to consider job after that, though we possessed some to perform, but on the upcoming track we moved across the US more south. All 3 of us were working a couple of cameras to make an effort to acquire scenery of New york city or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, but no details resource can be found. All of it appeared amazing coming from a couple of hundred miles away. I can not visualize the tragic settings on the ground.Aside from the mental effect of our nation being tackled as well as hundreds of our consumers and also maybe some good friends being actually eliminated, the absolute most difficult sensation being actually where I am is among solitude.Next day ... I presume the fatigue as well as psychological pressure obtained the most ideal of me. I could not stay awake and also remain to create. Today was actually still complicated, however we began obtaining more details, plus our experts had the honor of chatting directly along with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, who assured us that the ground crews would continue to function and ensure our safety, along with the secure function of the Place. Our company likewise learnt through our Manager, Mr. Goldin, that included that the companions in the Program are all entirely committed to continuing risk-free functions and also assistance. These were actually never ever concerns for me. I recognize all these individuals! The ground staffs have been actually exceptionally supporting, incredibly understanding of the impact of the information, and have tried to be as practical as feasible. They have all been actually really specialist and also concentrated though I can not think of the distraction of this sort of updates being available in and also the thought and feelings that authorities properties might be in jeopardy. They certainly never bypassed a beat, even when moving control centers. And also a group of senior workers and friends offered our team a rather comprehensive rundown on what was recognized and what was being actually carried out in the authorities and at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually very beneficial as well as sort of them to accomplish in the midst of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has additionally been supportive as well as helpful, making an effort to uplink newspaper article when our own properties were actually unusable, and also saying kind words ...My crewmates have been actually excellent, as well. They understand it is actually been actually a challenging day for me as well as the individuals on the ground, and they've made an effort to become as even keeled and also handy as achievable. Michael also fixed me my beloved Borscht soup for supper. And they offer me loads of space to assume when I needed it. They are very supportive and also obviously shocked at whoever would perform this.I recognize plenty of individuals in Washington, many folks that take a trip to DC as well as New York City, many that are actually captains, that I experienced certain I would receive a minimum of a few parts of bad news over the next few days. I acquired the very first one today when I found out that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that hit the Government was actually Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I came across Chic during the course of cadet summer months when our company were in the D&B all together, and also our team possessed great deals of classes with each other. I can not imagine what he has to of gone through, and currently I hear that he may have risen additionally than we can easily even consider by probably avoiding his airplane from being actually the one to attack the White Residence. What a horrendous reduction, but I'm sure Chic was battling fearlessly to the end. As well as rips don't stream the exact same precede ...It is actually hard to illustrate just how it really feels to be the only American completely off the world at a time including this. The emotion that I should be there with every one of you, coping with this, helping in some way, is mind-boggling. I know that our company are on the threshold (or beyond) of a horrendous change in the history of the world. Numerous things will certainly certainly never be the same once again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not only for the 1000s and 1000s of folks straight had an effect on by these horrendous acts of violence, yet possibly for everybody. Our experts will locate ourselves really feeling in a different way regarding dozens of traits, featuring probably space expedition, sadly.It's dreadful to see smoke putting coming from injuries in your very own nation coming from such an awesome point of view. The duality of getting on a space capsule committed to strengthening everyday life on the earth and enjoying lifestyle being destroyed through such premeditated, terrible process is actually jolting to the subconscious, no matter who you are actually. And the understanding that whatever are going to be actually various than when our experts released due to the time our experts land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation and in our management that our experts will certainly carry out everything feasible to much better defend her as well as our family members, and also to bring fair treatment of what has been done. I have self-confidence that the really good folks at NASA are going to carry out everything required to continue our objective securely as well as return our team carefully at the right time. And I miss out on each one of you very much. I can't be there with you personally, and also our company possess a long way to head to complete our mission, yet be actually particular that my soul is actually along with you, as well as know you remain in my petitions.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the final letter ... The good news is, it's been actually an active week up listed below. And also to verify that, like our country, our experts are actually continuing our planned pathway along with service customarily (as high as achievable). Tonight the most up to date addition to the station, the Russian Docking Compartment will certainly be launched from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (US time), it will definitely dock with our company, at a slot never ever made use of before on the nadir side of the Service Module. This new element is going to offer our team one more place to dock an Improvement or even Soyuz and also will give a sizable airlock with pair of able to be used hatches for administering EVA's in Russian Orlan suits, which our team will certainly carry out a few of prior to we return.The problem prior to in coping with this week was too little information. The complication right now is actually a lot of. It came at one time when email was recovered, as well as there is actually not enough time to read everything! Plus it is actually too difficult to manage all of it instantly. Yet I value obtaining it, and I truly cherish the excellent letters of help and friendly relationship I am receiving.We are doing well aboard, getting our work done, as well as speaking about points. Final evening our team possessed a long conversation over dinner regarding the implication of these events, the possible actions to observe, and also what ought to be done. After dinner, Michael challenged telling me that every email he obtained coming from pals in Russia pointed out primarily to tell me just how regretful they were actually that this happened, extending their condolences, and also inquiring just how I was actually performing. Vladimir instructed me the Russian phrase for "condolences" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian and also the English phrases are actually much too lengthy to verbalize effortlessly.) Really kind people.For the final pair of days, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to transmit live programs of radio updates concerning the celebration and also affiliated stories, to make sure I was properly educated. Every professional who has started free throw line to explain an operation or even a trouble contends some factor extended greetings to me along with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom told our company that because of the wedding day of remembrance in the US, throughout the day folks had been actually delivering florals and also edging all the wall surfaces of the US embassy in Moscow, as well as this night they were igniting candle lights in the road outside the consular office. Exactly how the planet has altered.People anywhere appear to acknowledge the senselessness and also scary in this attack. And also the tremendous loss. Moscow has managed these kind of issues in the final couple of years with home and also metro bombings, so they are as nervous to eliminate this risk as our team are actually. Yet the bottom line is actually that there are actually good people almost everywhere who want to reside in peace. I check out that a child asked, "United States is so good to various other nations, our experts regularly aid everyone, how can they dislike our team so much?".I wish the instance of cooperation as well as count on that this space probe and all individuals in the program show daily will sooner or later influence the rest of the world to work the same way. They must!Unfortunately, our team won't be actually flying over the United States while people are actually lighting candles. Do not understand if we might view that anyway. We did, having said that, view a quite unique as well as wonderful view a couple of mins ago: the launch of our Docking Chamber on a Soyuz booster. Our company were surpassing it as well as it emerged regarding three minutes after its launch from Baikonur as the sun hit our station, so it was actually still unaware. It appeared like a large comet along with a directly, wide rear silhouetted against the darker planet underneath. Despite some poor lighting for some time as the sun hit our home window at a low angle, I dealt with some video clip of it as first our company passed the rocket, and after that saw it start to catch up as it got elevation and also speed. I recorded until main engine cutoff and also booster separation took place equally we moved toward dawn on the Mountain ranges. A remarkable sight in an unforgettable full week ...Life happens, also precede. Our team are actually here to remain ... Frank.